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I Am The White Man Who’s Been Keeping You Down

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I Bet You’ll Vote Next Time Snowflake (Donald Trump)

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I Hate Bowling But I Love Sharing Shoes With Strangers

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I Committed Suicide

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I Fucking Love To Cuddle

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I Don’t Want To Sound Racist

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I Eat More Pussy Than Alf

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I Enjoy Entertainment

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I Can Not Get Any Satisfaction

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I Buy Crystal Meth For The Sudafed

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I Don’t Like Me Either

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I Don’t Need Condoms – The Aids Will Kill The Baby

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I Didn’t Buy This Shirt Because It Says Fuck On It. I Bought It Because It Says Fuck On It Twice

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I Dumped Adele

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I Already Hate The Next President

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I Believe In Happy Endings

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I Can’t. I Have Gymnastics

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I Drink In Moderation

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I Put The Porn In Popcorn

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I Put The Lotion In The Basket On The First Date

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I Put The Sexy In Dyslexia

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I Put The Cute In Execute

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I Just Want That Special Someone Who Won’t Press Charges

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I Only Wear This Shirt On Days Ending With Dystopian Landscape

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I Have That Disease Where I Look Like This

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I Quit Drinking (In Public)

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I Put Out For Santa

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I Hope There Is An Afterlife So I Can Waste That Too

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I Like Ribbons

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I Love Bush! (The Foliage Not The President)- And I Don’t Mean Foliage The Way You May Think